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Thread: Great thread by a T1 driver at local autocross

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    Senior Member bellwilliam's Avatar
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    Default Great thread by a T1 driver at local autocross

    great read by a wanna be autocrosser

    http://forums.solo2.com/viewtopic.php?f=7&t=1133

    by Oli Thordarson on 28 Nov 2008 22:15
    Today was a great day of AutoClub Speedway autocross practice for the dirty unwashed messes of T1 road racing. My 14 year old son Kristjan drove his kart during the lunch time break. He narrowly missed beating my best time. On one hand I wanted to see him beat my time, but on the other I know I would not hear the end of it for two weeks if he did.

    Everyone was a pleasant welcome to us noobs of cones and chalk. This was my second showing at a CalClub autocross event. Here is a link to the story of my first experience a bit over a year ago. Aw heck, I couldn’t find it anymore….

    Anyway, Steve Abbot was a big disappointment. He was talking smack for a couple of weeks. Isley said if Abbott could not beat some Neanderthals T1 guys by at least two seconds he should quit. He couldn’t meet that challenge. Heck, the T1 guys could barely find their way around the course. T1 drivers are not very near the top rung of RQ (Racing Intelligence Quotient). We get confused if there is not a clearly marked path of asphalt with walls and stuff. Sometimes we even then we get turned around.

    So Abbott is going to come on here and crow about his victory. What victory? Sure he posted a 63.8 to Dale’s 64.x and my 65.x, but I saw that supposed “fast run” of his. At solo practice I have found you guys don’t count cones and Abbott was counting on this omission. I watched his “fast run.” His silver Z06 looked like some sort of demented Pez dispenser on an overdose of fluorescent orange diuretics as he rounded the course. The way I calculated his time it should have been more like 863.8, but my calculator ran out of battery in the process. Next time I will keep it plugged into Dale’s generator when I am drawing that much power!

    As for my time, yeah, I was probably close to two seconds off of Abbott’s hyper renal pace, but I should have had the fastest time of day. I figure that with what I know now my car should have:
    1. More rear brake bias so I can rotate the beast into the corners better
    2. Fresher rear tires as she was over-steering like a moonshiner nanny tourist late to the Black Friday opening of Walmart NY.
    3. My race mirrors removed so I can see those danged markers on the tighter corners… REALLY!
    4. Changed my oil as I am sure that would be good for another 15 HP
    5. Filled my window washer tank in my car so I can rinse off all that orange fluorescent cone stuff I got on my windshield while waiting to get around Abbott on one of his slower runs where he actually managed to go in between some cones.
    6. And a few other mods I need to keep secret for competitive advantage.

    The way I figure it, I could have done a 48.xxx lap with a little better advance understanding of this motorsport you guys are so snooty about. I figure the:
    o better tires are worth about .5 second
    o better brake bias another .5 second
    o removal of those mirrors, since I don’t need to be looking for you dudes anyway, is worth another .5 second
    o secret modifications 1.5 seconds
    o But just filling my window washer tank and getting Abbott the heck out of my way is worth another 14 seconds so I can uncork my wild 8 banger from Hay Deez.

    Yeah, I met a lot of you naysayers out there today. But what do you guys know. You wouldn’t even let me make the changes to my car and then go out there and run another session by myself. What are you afraid of? Do you think some dumb road racer is gonna beat ya? What is that joke you guys always tell? If road racers where any smarter they would be called autocrossers or something like that…?

    I think the ring leader was that dude in the white beemer running that big black wing. Simanyi is his name. Sure, he was all smiles, but can you really trust a guy that nice? People say he did a 62.0 flat. I think not. It’s a Beemer. I have never seen a BMW win NASCAR or a drag race so how can they go fast?

    And who is the dude with the bald head and the funny way of talking. I thought we done run all them dudes off of the continent. Max Hayter is the name. That sounds like the name of a bad guy in a 1930’s comic strip. But I can’t be too rough on him. He went way out of his way to get the youth steward to come out just for my son to run his kart. It’s a good thing my son didn’t beat my time today Hayter or we’d be talkin’!!!

    The real sleeper today was Katy Nicholl. She turned a 67 in a little unassuming red Miata that isn’t even hers. I have to pick those cars out of my radiator after a road race, but she made that car scoot. I felt so prideful when she asked for a ride in my car. Then I watched her drive. Waves of humiliation akin to my first autocross experience returned. I had to call Smiling Bob and order some Enzyte after witnessing her driving performance. Next time I will be a little more humble and hand her the keys. I will certainly learn a lot more about going fast from her than Abbott!
    Supermiata S1, SuperMiata S2, Supermiata S3
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    Senior Member mlk_f1's Avatar
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    What's Traction Control? 600RR_Rocket's Avatar
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    Best link ever!!!

    Unfortunately, I fall into the loser category of "Time Trialers." W2W is my next goal in life, once I make enough $$$...
    Last edited by 600RR_Rocket; 12-02-2008 at 09:45 PM.

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    What's Traction Control? 600RR_Rocket's Avatar
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    Hmmm...does this sound like Oli anyone???

    Regarding W2W racers...

    They have big heads, big egos, they think they are cool, and they can be tremendously condescending. Some even have the gall to have their own website touting their latest "racing adventures".

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    Senior Member rob.ok's Avatar
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    Thank you so much for sharing! That totally made my night!

    Filled with so much truth......
    Check out my '08 build on s2ki.com here....rob.ok track build.

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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    It is a good thing I was a quick learner last Friday the SCCA autocross practice. This autocross stuff is really useful. I was at the airport tonight. I just returned from a business trip in Chicago.

    The airport still had some traffic cones and stuff set-up from all the Thanksgiving weekend traffic. My flight was a bit late so I thought I would see what my Expedition could do through those cones as I hustled home.

    I had a blast weaving and shucking that 6500 lb brick through the make-shift course. I really started to get the rhythm down as I picked up speed. I must have been doing good as one of the airport sheriffs on one of those new-fangled three wheelers started waving his arms and cheering me on. As I picked up my pace he got all excited and came over to race me. It was a great run, but as I built momentum he could not keep up. I just laughed and yelled that he needs to practice more and shouted that there is a practice on the 13th. One of his buddies at the other end of the white curb zone shouted something into his Motorola. I think he said they would be there.

    Wow! I just love sharing my enthusiasm and getting others involved. This next practice day is going to be day everyone remembers for sure!

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    What's Traction Control? 600RR_Rocket's Avatar
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    I posted the The Pyramid of Speed on S2KI and one bored member re-created it:


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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    He left out land speed record guys and moon buggy driving astronauts.

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    By anyone's measure, Oli working his way down the pyramid, from Road Racing to Autocrossing. By April he'll be street racing.
    The deposed former Sheriff of trackHQ . . .

    2006 Porsche 997 Carerra Coupe 6-MT - daily driver
    1992 Honda (Acura) NSX 5-MT - classic investment I couldn't resist and occasionally drive
    2004 Honda S2000 AP2 6-MT - track day car
    2006 Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution IX MR 6-MT - when I need a backseat, 4-doors, or a real trunk, and still want to haul ass . . .

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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Richard EVO View Post
    By anyone's measure, Oli working his way down the pyramid, from Road Racing to Autocrossing. By April he'll be street racing.
    Yes, before you know it you will see me at another drift event.

    Before too long I will be racing past your house at about 2 AM in my T1 car.

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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    Hey, does anyone know of a good bar that is open before lunch that shows ESPN so I can go sit around and talk about how my racing season is over....

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    i dont care
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    where are the minivan driving moms on that chart?

    they should be on there.... towards the bottom...
    driving cars n stuff....

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    Quote Originally Posted by Olitho View Post
    Hey, does anyone know of a good bar that is open before lunch that shows ESPN so I can go sit around and talk about how my racing season is over....
    Planning on getting tanked-up before you go street racing? Good idea . . .
    The deposed former Sheriff of trackHQ . . .

    2006 Porsche 997 Carerra Coupe 6-MT - daily driver
    1992 Honda (Acura) NSX 5-MT - classic investment I couldn't resist and occasionally drive
    2004 Honda S2000 AP2 6-MT - track day car
    2006 Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution IX MR 6-MT - when I need a backseat, 4-doors, or a real trunk, and still want to haul ass . . .

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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Richard EVO View Post
    Planning on getting tanked-up before you go street racing? Good idea . . .
    I drive better that way!

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    Chest hair required Olitho's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nils View Post
    where are the minivan driving moms on that chart?

    they should be on there.... towards the bottom...
    If you live near where I do I would put them somewhere between wheel to wheel and rally except more aggressive and cunning.


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    Senior Member robburgoon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Olitho View Post
    Before too long I will be racing past your house at about 2 AM in my T1 car.
    Holy crap that mental picture is just hilarious!

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    Senior Member vetteguy2005's Avatar
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    We left off racing with cops at the airport on segways???
    Corvette Specialty C6
    Life is like a race, the best times win!

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